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1001 Tips for Military Families – Tip #445

When You Get Back Box – Tip #445

My husband is about to leave again for at least 2 months there are some news things that we are going to give a try.  They aren’t going to make time go faster or change the fact that he is going to leave a big hole that we won’t be able to fill but it may help us with the re-integration and give us a chance to focus on thinking on something positive.  There are often times when my husband is away and we will sit at the dinner table and talk about all the things we will do when he is back.  Many of these are good ideas but also slip our minds as the weeks pass by.  We have decided to make a “When You Are Back” box.  It is going to be set up in the kitchen with cards/paper beside it and when we think of something that we want to do when he is back, we write it on the card.  When he is back he can draw cards and choose things that he wants to do with everyone.  It will be a great way for everyone to reconnect and take some of the pressure off of having to come up with ideas when he is back and life is in full swing.  By also setting a limit of 1-2 to draw a week it will not overwhelm my husband either and make him feel as though he has to make up over 8 weeks of time all of a sudden and be all things to all people instantly.

When You Are Back Box

When You Are Back Ideas:

* Go hiking

* Read ___________ together

* See the movie _________________ together

* Take a dance class together

* Play latest version of ______________

* Go for a bike ride

* Make all our favourite foods type dinner

For more information about our tips, books and resources go to: www.whileyouwereaway.org


More Tips for Military Families – #164

Staying Safe – Tip #164

When your family member is away training, on exercise, deployed or you are away visiting family and friends there are some things that you can do to ensure your safety, your family’s and that you have a house that has all of your belongings inside it.  🙂 Extended absences of family members can make you and your house prime targets.

Safety Tips:

* Let trusted neighbours and friends know that you are going to be away

* Invest in an alarm system, if affordable.  Make sure you also provide the company with additional contact information

* Put a hold on mail and ask someone to check that junk flyers and mail are not piling up too

* Hire someone you trust to cut your grass or remove snow regular and work out a pay schedule in advance

* Don’t keep your emergency house key in an obvious spot – it is better to leave it with a trust neighbour (one thing a neighbour and I did was switch keys and hide each others in the flower pot, this way they would try the key in the door and it wouldn’t work!)

For more information about our tips, books or resources, go to: http://www.whileyouwereaway.org

To submit a tip of your own write to: Megan@whileyouwereaway.org

Reader’s Tip #9

Our Reader’s Tip on Surviving Deployments

When my husband is gone, I do several things to help our sons and myself through our separation.

* I live by a routine, especially with a toddler, it helps with getting through each day more smoothly and it also helps with reintegration, except daddy might be the one giving the bath or reading bedtime stories.

* I remind myself to maintain my sense of humor when Murphy’s Law kicks in…in that situation when all …breaks loose and you don’t know whether to laugh or cry, I always laugh.

* With boys I realize that they need their dad time, I know that I am a lousy substitue for him, but I am always willing to throw a football, wrestle, or do whatever guy stuff that they want me too in order to try to fill the gap left by their dad being away.
* When it is finally time for reintegration, I try really hard not to criticize him for not doing things my way and take it for what it is, him trying to reestablish himself as a vital member of our family in the best way that he can.

* I try not to set my expectations too high and to have patience because I realize that things will not be perfect right away and that they will not be exactly the same as they were before he left.  However, we will recreate a life together, we will reconnect and that things will be okay.

* I remind myself that time does not freeze while they are gone, they have had new experiences that have changed them and I will have changed in my own way too.

* I try to remember that he was not at summer camp so it is unfair of me to resent him for doing his job and that I knew what I was getting into when I married him.

Carolyn – Robins Air Force Base

For more information about our tips, books or resources, go to: http://www.whileyouwereaway.org

To submit a tip of your own, write to: Megan@whileyouwereaway.org

Reader’s Tip #8


I found your site and others that support military families through Facebook.  I have ‘Liked” a few sites that provide free support, ideas, suggestions and activities.  This was something quite new to me – as I really didn’t consider using Facebook to find information, connect with other wives, learn about strategies and even discounts and freebies!  My tip is really that I think all military families should go through searches on Facebook, ‘Like’ a few sites and then read posts that will up lift and give them a sense of being understood or supported, get good information and ideas.

Louise, Georgia – USA

Some site suggestions from While You Were Away:

* Blue Star Mothers

* Ubiquitious Magazine

* LoveOurSoldiers

* Operation Military Love

* Military.com

* MissYourVoice

* Just For Military

* The Frugal Army Wife

For more information about our blogs, resources or books go to: http://www.whileyouwereaway.org

To submit a tip of your own, write to: Megan@whileyouwereaway.org