Tip #99 – Be Organized
When I wrote “101 Tips for When They’re Back” I had a fair number of suggestions for making life easier for their return by being organized. Since we are in the final 60 day stretch I decided that it may be good to start going through the reunion book and living some of my own advice from there too. I still stand by all of what I said and truly believe that there is a certain loss of control that I have to be willing to give up again. For the most part, I have been the one making the decisions about what we eat, what things we do in the evenings, where we go, when we go to sleep and so on and so on. Now I am going to have to readjust to sharing those decisions with someone else. Being organized will help me feel less out of control (yes, I am one of those people that finds coming home to a clean house one of the greatest feelings in the world – EVERYTHING REALLY DOES HAVE A PLACE! Despite what my husband and kids say…).
By the time he gets home I will have…
* Cleaned out the areas of the house that were my husband’s and make them ready for him to invade again (or… to make a mess of and frustrate me but everyone has to have a space to do what they want with)
* Organize the fridge and freezer so that I not only know what we have but that I know we have things he likes too – it will also take the guess work out of meals and make life easier
* Do some bulk shopping for boring things like toilet paper, soaps, etc. – less time in the stores and less hastle
* Sort through and prioritize the mail that is stuffed into a box the door (this has not been a good example but with so much to deal with, if it was addressed to my husband and didn’t look like a bill or urgent, it got shoved into a box)
* Try to get some work done ahead of time so that I can take a few days when he gets back and not feel overwhelmed with a long list of things to do on top of getting used to having to go back to sleeping on my side of the bed!
* Go through the calendar and see what things are going to be happening and try to do things in advance to help reduce the amount of running around when he first gets home (I am going to buy some birthday cards in advance, get some birthday presents and wrap and label them, get postage stamps, etc.)
* Send a copy of our calendar to my husband so that he knows some of what he is coming home to as well
* Write ahead of time and ask what things he is missing the most (besides his favourite wife and kids). This way I can pick them up when I have time rather than dashing around in the last few days
Regardless of whether or not I am totally organized or a complete mess, reunions are hard. I really believe that being organized will only help with a smoother reintegration for everyone. People often tell me that it must be so hard to have my husband away so much – it is but… it is very hard to get used to sharing a life again after a long deployment too and many times for us, it has been the hardest part. My husband has been at home with us for a total of 67 days in 2 years. Getting used to life together again is going to be something I need to begin preparing for and living my own advice!
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Filed under: Living My Own Advice, Military Family Support - Tips from the 101 Tips books | Tagged: deployment, military, military families, military family, organized, organizing, reintegration, reunion, tips |